Good tip. I topped my tee shot on the first on Sunday in a comp. Got nervous as it became my turn to play. Funnily enough I had a gut feel the tee was too low. Must have caught the top 1/4” of the ball. Went 50 yds, stopping short of the ladies tee box. Second shot - cleared my head of any thoughts- 200yd stinger dead straight. Recovered from any sense of embarrassment
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For me, its adrenalin. I just get amped for the first tee. I try to tucker myself out on the range to even myself out which, limited success. 
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Welcome to the forum!
I think the key is to have the goal of making it just as fun for them as it will be for you. I got paired up with a threesome a couple months, and they all knew each other, so I was the only stranger. I just introduced myself, let them pick the tees they wanted to play (I played from there as well) and then let them tee off first. My goal was just to make sure I fit in and didn’t detract from their day. I was a much better player than all 3 of them, and spent much of the day finding golf balls, and giving out compliments when they hit good shots. At the end of the round I had a standing invite to play golf with them any time I wanted. Turned out to be a great day!
Golf is supposed to be fun, and at one time or another we’ve all been terrible at it. Unless you have the misfortune of getting paired up with a terrible person, everyone is just looking to have a fun time, hit some good shots and laugh a little bit. Just focus on doing your best to do that and I’m sure it will help ease those nerves.
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The most nervous I’ve ever been was playing with my dad when I was 19 or 20 years old at a course near where he grew up. He ran into an old high school pal as we were waiting to tee off on #10. I was a much better player than my dad, but was probably a 7 or 8 handicap at the time, so capable of good things but also inconsistent. I was a long hitter at that point though.
As I’m behind the ball getting lined up, I hear my dad say to his friend, “watch this.” Well, I immediately got the most nervous I’ve ever been! Luckily I hit a good one right down the middle and my dad was able to gloat about his kid. But as we drove away in the cart I told him to never do that again. LOL.
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THIS! although this theory fails on putts inside of 4 feet!
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I agree that your playing partners have a lot to do with the nerves. I often play as a single and I often worry about whether my playing partners will think “Oh Golly…we are getting paired up with a woman player. Is she going to slow us down? Does she know the etiquette?” 99.9% of the time my partners been extremely gracious once they realize that you know that you can play, keep up with them and know the etiquette.
I went out once as a single and the two gentlemen in front of me asked if I wanted to join them which I did. Near the end of the round, they asked another single to join us. After I hit one of my drives long and straight, he said “wow”. They said, “Yeah, we know. She’s been doing that all day.” They kept it light and fun and I played one of my best rounds.
I had a friend who went out as a single on a recent Sunday. She was nervous as she joined two other gentlemen. They told her on the first tee that they were going to read a passage from the Scriptures before teeing off. They proceeded to pull out Harvey Penick’s Red Book and read a passage from the book. That broke the ice and she said she had a great time!!
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I’d love to play a round and buy a round of drinks with these guys. Absolutely love this.
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From address to follow through repeat saying the number 9 over and over. Trick I learned from a performance coach a few years ago.
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“I am the best driver of the golf ball on the planet”
“Knock the sh*t out of it”
“If I hit it into the junk, I do it with AUTHORITY”
Great drivers free wheel it. I always try and have assertive swing thoughts. Pre shot routine and then let it loose.
If I get into trying to steer it, I’m dead.
“Lose control to gain control”
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Oh, I hit it into the junk ALOT btw. That’s golf though. Go find it and move on.
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Shooters gotta shoot. You gotta bring that Iverson mentality out there!
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Yeah that’s it - tell yourself … or even say it aloud for everyone’s benefit … “Whew ok got that one outta the way!”
Also agree with all the comments about focus on you and on your process and on your shot … in that 1.1 second nothing else matters!
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I was on Cape Cod this summer with family; I’m the only golfer.
I made a tee time for myself and the four guys ahead of me invited me to join them. I was nervous, but accepted.
Next tee all four shanked - the oldest guy said “well, all you need is 20 yards and you’ll outdrive all of us”.
I nailed one around 165-170 straight up the pipe.
Lots of good natured ribbing and fun the rest of the day.
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Great way to look at it, it’s going into my mental toolkit!
Love that story! I play most all my rounds solo, but the last week or so, have been invited to play by a gentleman, very kind,enjoyed that round, and today invited myself to join another senior lady and her great nephew- we had a blast, and enjoyed cheering on the young kid, who seems a natural! I state up front I’m a beginner, so they can decide if that’s a problem, no problems so far!
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We were all beginners once and when we play with beginners we remember back to those times and also remember the journey and as such can offer encouragement. My current playing partners remember me as a beginner and marvel at my journey from not being able to break 100 to a sometimes 80s shooter. My first round at my club was 151! We all have to start somewhere.
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